"Sadie." John returned the warm smile as he looked up from his guitar.

"May I sit?" I smiled in awe of the music he'd been playing.

"Course you can." He motioned his head for me to sit beside him, putting his guitar pick in his mouth as he leaned over his guitar to write down the lyrics in his notebook.

"That was lovely, the song." I grinned as I sat beside him, putting down my guitar beside me.

"It's really not much, yet at least." He shrugged scribbling down a final thing before looking up.

"That doesn't mean it won't be anything." I said with a glimmer of awe in my eyes.

"Suppose you're right." He smirked looking back down to the page.

"John, can I ask you something?" I felt a pit of guilt in my stomach thinking about Paul again.

He nodded attentively causing my stomach to churn.

"Why did you tell everyone about Paul and I going to the pool? I realize how it might've seemed, I-I just wanted to know why it bothered you so much." I became reserved afraid of how he might react, but the question eating me up knowing he had done it.

"I think you're aware as to why." He spoke stiffening his upper lip looking down to his guitar.

"John you know Paul would do that to Jane-" I began lying through my teeth.

"-I wasn't talking about Jane." He looked back up into my eyes and I felt I couldn't dodge the obvious truth in front of me.

"You're married John." I reminded him quietly because of his tendency to forget.

"And Paul has a fiancée," he looked at me in the eyes making me bow my head in shame, "that doesn't mean either of us are happy in our relationships."

"So what?" I looked back at him feeling slightly offended, "I'm being used as the other woman by the both of ye' to get back at Jane and Cynthia?" I said with a furrowed brow looking back to John seeing his features turn sorrow realizing how he'd made it sound.

I shook my head getting up, "if that's all I'm good for, as far as I'm concerned both of you can sod off. I'm tired of being used for some sick game, I'm not your groupie, John. I might as well leave back for London now." I sighed out frustratedly picking up my guitar, not wanting to hear him tell me it wasn't like that when I knew it was.

I stormed off down the pathway feeling my anger get the better of me. I felt as if I should just go home and forget about this all ever happened. It was a mess since the trip had begun, this had scarcely been about music thus far.

"Oh come on Sadie." John said catching up to me in a haste causing me to turn around with a solid glare.

"John I don't want to hear-" I began before realizing he was looking at something beyond me, causing me to turn back around to see the press hiding beyond the fencing of the ashram.

"Smile and keep walking." John said between his teeth as the two of us began walking past them past some ashram buildings to get more privacy.

It seemed paparazzi were everywhere trying to get a sneak peak of what was happening inside the ashram.

"Look," John said with one quick scan around us, "-You can't leave because of Paul and I. Even if we were acting like a couple of arses we never saw you as a groupie. Hell, Paul's mad for ye', I can tell assure you of that much." John scoffed braking eye contact with me.

"So, what am I to you then John? A bit of fun?" I spoke after a pause.

He shook his head looking down with a certain softened look in my eyes.

"You're," he began, "you're not just a bit of fun." He said holding himself back.

"Well, good." I spoke walking past him, slightly amused watching him be so desperate to try and apologize since it seemed wildly of our character.

"-then, I hope we can agree I'm not a toy." I said walking backward to see Johns expression falter slightly as I walked off, turning back around and smirking as I walked away.
________________

That night the group of us all had a fire, and despite my uneasy feeling about it I went and sat legs crossed on the group laughing as some of the lads sang goofy renditions of old show tunes that I had no idea they would even be aware of in the first place.

"Well the huge he guilty found her, for robbing a homeward bounder," the group sang drunkenly from the liquor and pot that had been sneakily smuggled in due to the Maharishi blatant distaste for it.

Everyone was in good spirits, and despite my recent turmoil with the group, I'd found myself having fun as well.

From the corner of my eye I notice Ringo obviously gone from a sober state, cuddling a bottle of whiskey, his eyes shutting in a buzzed state.

I smiled with a small laugh shaking my head, sticking my stick with a marshmallow (also snuck in) closer in the fire.

I felt the presence of someone sitting beside me, turning my head to see Paul, causing my heart to stop, looking around to see if Jane was shooting daggers at me somewhere in the sea of people.

"She's gone to bed." He assured me with a warm drunken smile, causing me to become more comfortable, though looking back to the fire away from him uncomfortably.

"I know you write your own songs, but I wrote something I thought maybe we could use as a song on your album." He spoke staring ahead at the fire as well.

"Well, what is it?" I looked to him unable to stop myself from feeling a bit excited, Paul McCartney had written a song for me to sing.

"It's called Goodbye." He grinned too toothily.

I cleared my throat realizing how excited I had seemed, retracting myself back into a shell.

"So, when do I get to hear it?" I said more calmly, in attempt to play nice tough I wanted to question whether Jane knew.

"Well, I don't think I can play it now, but tomorrow probably." He laughed having another sip of his beer giggling slightly to himself.

"Right." I let out an uneasy laugh exhaling a sharp breath.

There was a brief silence between the two of us as we listened in the the group, though I could tell Paul had a lot on his mind.

"Sadie, I'm sorry, I am." He spoke finally, his features twisted downwards pulling his need further into his chest as he leaned back up.

"No problem, we can forget about it yeah? It's over now." I said feeling guilt as his expressions fell from my words.

Paul nodded, pursed lipped in thought.

"I think I'd better turn in." I said with a yawn finding myself an excuse to distance myself from him, seeing him nod downcast.

I rose to my feet and began to stumble past some of the people all huddled around the fire.

I felt a sharp pinch on my ass from a masculine hand, gaining a yelp from me becoming infuriated by the pig who had done it, turning around to the strangers face as swiftly striking him across the cheek angrily.

"Is there a problem here?" John appeared, shoving the stranger obviously ready to throw a punch or two as he was liquored up.

The stranger shook his head intimidated by how crazed John looked out of anger.

"John, I'm okay." I walked over to him, guiding away from him, beginning to walk back to our bungalow.

John was grumbling angrily to himself as we walked, causing me to giggle.

"Bastard, who does he think he is," I heard under the other grumbles.

"John you didn't have to come protect me." I spoke almost defensively, highly amused at how infuriated he was.

"Why is he even here if that's his attitude? Sodding terrible if you ask me." John stopped to face me motioning back to the fire.

"John,"

"Sadie, you know why I care." John interrupted.

"I already told you why you shouldn't." I responded, feeling my heart rate picking up as he seemed to inch closer

"I can't help how I feel," he was so close that he tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, "I want you." He spoke in a low voice, causing a shiver up my spine.

"I-" I began to close my eyes as I felt his face inch closer.

"John I cant," I forced myself out of his reach, "I won't do this to your wife and your son." I was disgusted by the notion, I was not a home wrecker.

"What if I got a divorce." John said flatly, causing my heart to stop.

Surely he was just blurting things out because of his current state, I could barley even understand him in the first place. Surely, he wasn't thinking.

"You wouldn't do that John, and I am not going to be the reason why." I was frightened by how serious he seemed.

"I'm already having an affair." He blurted surprising even himself.

He-what?