So before yall attack me I just want to say that I'm not being offensive towards the fact that Shawn smokes weed but this is all fictional.
This imagine contains many sensitive topics.
Read at your own risk.
Okay so let's begin!
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Your P. O. V.
"Hey y/n how's Shawn doing?" One of the girl from my school asked me.
I wasn't really friends with her.
"I don't know." I got up and left the café.
I don't wanna talk to anyone.
It's been 1 year since I left Shawn.

Why?
I'm a bad influence.
I'm really bad.
He's so handsome, gorgeous and fit.
And I?
I am fat, my body full of stretch marks.
I was depressed.
But he helped me through it all.
He brought me out of the dark world.
He made me smile.
He made me laugh.
He loved me.
But he needed someone beautiful, someone fit and gorgeous.

And I wasn't that someone.
He begged for me to not leave him.
I loved him.
I still love him.
And I always will.

It's not like he was the only one who was hurt.
I was hurt too.
It's not like it was just the hate getting to me, it was me.
I myself hated me.
Let's just basically say that I was hella insecure.

"Y/N!!!!!!" sav shouted.
"Yeah?" I turned around.
"Y/n I know Shawn and you have broken up but you need to meet him.
Right now!!" She said.
I rolled my eyes.
"No way.im not meeting him." I said and started to walk.
"Yes y/n.
You need to, he'll die." She said.
I stopped walking.

I turned around.
"Huh?"
"He'll die without you.
He's doing something  he isn't supposed to.
You're simply giving him pain.
And now you're going to be the medicine to that pain." She said.

Her eyes said it all.
Every word she said was true.
Oh god!
I need to....Shawn!
"Where can I find him?" I asked.
"His old apartment." She said.
I ran across the street.

I got to his old apartment.
"Shawn...." I whispered.
I climbed the stairs and stood in front of his apartment door.
How will I do this?

After taking several deep breaths, I finally knocked.
No answer.
I remembered that he always kept the spare key in the vase which was next to his door.

With hope, I looked inside the vase and found the key.
I unlocked the door and opened it.
Please read at your own risk.
Sensitive topics.

The smell of weed, alcohol filled my nose.
"Shawn?" I called out.
I walked in the kitchen.
The whole apartment was a mess.
Nothing was in it's place.

"S-shawn?" I saw him laid down on the floor.
He looked so messy but yet he was so gorgeous.
I couldn't control my tears anymore.
It seemed like he was in a deep slumber.

He wore a Grey obey goodie and his sweatpants.
I decided not to wake him up.
I took off my jacket and purse and kept it on the table I used to.

I somehow managed to take Shawn to the bedroom and laid him on the bed.
I put the blanket over him and kissed his forehead.

I walk out of the bedroom and look at the horrible mess.
A bottle of alcohol and weed.
It was all scattered.

I had to clean that too.
I cleaned the whole place up in a few minutes.

Finally, it looks good.
I was tired so I sat on the couch.
Does he smoke weed?
Why are there do many bottles of alcohol?

I heard a groan and I flinched.
My heart beat was faster than ever.
I walked to the bedroom.
Shawn's palm was resting on his forehead.

"Shawn?" I said.
His eyes shot open, he sat up and liked at me.
A huge smile on his face.
"Y/n!!!!" He tried to walk to me but he stumbled and fell back on the bed.
"Shawn...be careful." I helped him sit up on the bed.

"You're back y/n I missed you so much pleas don't leave okay?" He said.
The way he's talking is a little strange.
"how've you been Shawn?" I asked.
"Crazy." He said.
That huge smile never left his face.

He winced out of nowhere.
"What happened?" I asked.
"N-Nothing it's fine everything's Fine. " he said.
He hid his arms inside the blanket.
Some things wrong for sure.

I took his arm out of the blanket.
"W-what are you d-doing y/n?!" He pulled  all his arm.
"Shawn...shh" I took his arm and rolled the sleeves up.

I saw something Is never...ever wanted to see.
His arms were full of cuts.
A tear fell from my eye as I looked down at the cuts.

"Baby....." I whispered.
"Im sorry-
I cut him off my placing a finger Onto his lips.
I pulled the left arm and rolled it's sleeve.
Same sight.

He looked away.
"Why did you do this Shawn?" I whispered.
"I am sorry y/n.
I missed you and the pain pain of you leaving me was unbearable.
To make that pain less, I did this.
I smoked weed so much and was drunk all the time.
I couldn't bear the pain.
I'm sorry." He said.
"When did you start?" I asked.
"Since you left me." He said.

I never knew he loved me this much.
I looked at him.
"I'm sorry Shawn.
I promise I'll never leave you again." I brought his arms to my lips and kissed all of the cuts.

"I still love you." He said.
"I can see that....and I still love you too.
I'm so sorry." I wrapped my arms around his neck and he held me as if it was the last second if his life.

He held me as if there's no tomorrow.
We both leaned In and I connected our lips.
I felt the same sparks I used to.
I missed his lips.
I missed him.
"You're the medicine to my pain." He said after I pulled away.

"And you are the light in my dark world." I said.
He pulled me into a kiss full of love and passion.

"Don't ever leave me again." He said
I laughed
"I won't." I said.
"Pinky promise?" He held up his pinky.
"Pinky promise baby." I attached my pinky finger to his.
*************
Hii guys!!!
So I cried a lot while writing this!
I'm sorry.
Thank you for 5.05k reads!
I love yall so so much and I'm grateful for yall!

Love yall!

-Chocolate Muffin.